Appreciated (:

Today I was actually dragging my feet to work. Afterall, its SUNDAY!! My SUNDAY :(.

BUT something put a smile on my face :)

THIS! :)


Well, this colleague is leaving for another place, so he bought some of these chocs and gave it to some of us. I was pretty surprised when I received it from my senior (I think he gave them out ytd but I was having my day off.). It was uncalled for, but it's certainly a pleasant surprise :).
Yes, it may be a small gift (but I think it's rather costly considering its ROYCE CHOCOLATE!! Mmmm!! :D), but its really the thought that counts. It just makes me feel very appreciated! :)

Alright, its not the first choc I receive for the week. Our dear friend B who came for internship gave me chocs on his last day too. BUT, what makes Alvin special was because I receive it on a Sunday. HAHAH. B, sorry ar, wrong day :D. But I appreciate your choc la ;). I'm savouring them one by one okay! Haha :D

Pretty pleasant for a WORKING Sunday afternoon, isn't it :).

Such little acts of appreciation can really bring joy to working, like really! :)

Have you been appreciating people around you lately? Time to start doing so! :).

Looking back..

Today was a looong day, I was up since 4.30am in the morning and was home only at 11+pm after cg.

For some reason, I don't feel like sleeping. Felt this emptiness, had this urge to read my previous entries from my previous blog.

As I was reading, I felt so blessed.

Those who know me would have read my previous blog before, and know the kind of things that I went through for the past 4 months ever since I transitted to this new career.

I was reading, and realised how much I've grown. I'm not the same, O childish Cincinnati anymore, I've since grew up as a result of all these, no matter how bad they are.

And I realised, I'm able to cope so much better at work now. Previously I took it so hard whenever my supervisors scolds me. I often break down and cry many times after listening to those scoldings. I still remembered myself being so miserable after a comment made, and I cried while eating my dinner. For that 30mins while I was on break, I was sobbing.

But now, no longer am I that weak girl. I've emerged stronger from all the things I've went through :). I still cry when I'm hurt, but I've learnt how to wipe off those tears and move on.

The best part of them all, you'll love this :).

God was with me through EVERY SINGLE bad day that I went through :).

As I read, I saw so many ocassions whereby I'll hear the voice of God encouraging me, verses of encouragements or simply a loving touch from God. How awesome, isn't it?

"Whom have I in heaven but You?
And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You.
My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. "
Psalm 73:25-26

I felt so blessed to know that God has always been there, shaping and moulding me to be a better person through these trials. There was a short period of time when I was really bitter, really cynical with life. I never wanted to trust anyone anymore. He showed me,

"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
Psalm 34:17

There was a time when my dad got himself into some bad debts and my house was at risk of being auctioned (as he may have to declare bankruptcy), yet he was doing nothing about it. I remembered myself being very angry and bitter with him. I felt that my dad is leaving all the junk to us and he himself being very happy and still out drinking. Yet the reassuring voice of the Lord said, "I know how it feels to be forsaken by your own father", and was immediately led to the scene at Calvary.

There were times when I felt that I've lost myself in work. I became so bitter with everyone that I simply drown myself in work so that I can get everything done properly and prevent scoldings. I didn't felt like doing anything else, didn't felt like going anywhere. My fire died down, I became another person. But God reminded me of the verse that led me to nursing,

"You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."
Matthew 5:14-16

At every point, God was there, picking me up when I fall, lifting me up when I was down. I'm just thankful that I could be at where I am now.

2 months more and probation will be over (hopefully). It was only 4 months and I've been through so much, emotionally, mentally and spiritually (talk about transition phase man!), I'm sure there's more to learn. I'm only glad that these 4 months, I have Daddy God with me all the time. When people are hard to trust, God remains faithful. :)

" but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint."
Isaiah 40:31

May this marks the start of a greater, stronger, joyful and better Cincinnati :). Glory to glory, amen? :)

Red Bull Drink Seen to Increase Stroke Risk

"CANBERRA (Reuters) Aug 15 - Just one can of the popular stimulant energy drink Red Bull can increase the risk of MI or stroke, even in young people, Australian medical researchers said on Friday.

The caffeine-loaded beverage, popular with university students and adrenaline sport fans to give them "wings", increased blood viscosity.

Scott Willoughby and colleagues tested the cardiovascular systems of 30 young adults one hour before and one hour after consuming one 250-ml can of sugar-free Red Bull.

The results showed "normal people develop symptoms normally associated with cardiovascular disease" after consuming the drink, created in the 1980s by Austrian entrepreneur Dietrich Mateschitz based on a similar Thai energy drink.

"One hour after they drank Red Bull, (their blood systems) were no longer normal. They were abnormal like we would expect in a patient with cardiovascular disease," Willoughby, lead researcher from the Cardiovascular Research Centre at the Royal Adelaide Hospital, told the Australian newspaper."

"But Willoughby said Red Bull could be deadly when combined with stress or high blood pressure, impairing proper blood vessel function and possibly lifting the risk of blood clotting.

"If you have any predisposition to cardiovascular disease, I'd think twice about drinking it," he said ."

Read full article from eMedicine.com.

THANK GOD I NEVER LIKED RED BULL.

Then I suddenly wonder, am I predisposing my dad to AMI or stroke, since whenever he goes hypo, we'll feed him with redbull (he likes it, plus its reaally sweet and when he goes hypo, he goes REALLY hypo. Like 2.0-3.0.)

Goodness. Now I'll really think twice about drinking red bull. :S.

Inflexible people!! >_<

I almost got a heart attack today at work.

Today I was settling some stuffs and I was calling my client's advocate. WAHHH. She was SOOOO inflexible?! Every "nononononono, cannot!!!" (and she repeated it for like 10 times!!) that she said, I felt myself burning. I was super angry and fuming mad can. It was really a waste of time which can be prevented if not for miscommunication. And, since it was miscommunication on our part, can't u be a little more flexible? Cut the "NONONONONO CANNOT!!" laaa..

Best part, she actually have the audacity to ask my client's family to pay. Finally I shot her back at how unfair it is if my client's family has to pay for a mistake that is not even his fault, she finally kept quiet.

The funny thing was, we were like silent on the phone for like 10 seconds. Machiam drama.

She finally (FINALLY!) decided to speak to her supervisor, and they PAID. Hurhur.

But anw, after the whole thing was settled, I started having some bad chest tightness. Man, it was so uncomfortable. It was super super tight, and I could feel some palpitations. I wasn't having any breathing difficulties, though, but my chest was really tight for about 10mins.

I'm just thankful I'm still alive, blogging about what happened. (HAHA. I'm feeling more and more wayang man :D!)

I think I stress myself out too much at the slightest things sometimes.

I'm such a type A personality person, and someday I may just collapse in my workplace. Grr.

EVERYONE, please learn ur CPR ar. Hahah :D. You may be my "benefactor" in future :D. Keke.

Time for a break. Gotta rest my sore legs :)

BREAST friend outing :)

Today is my hard-earned AFS day off.

BUT.

I had to return to my workplace to hand in some documents (read: Love-hate relationship). AND, E2, being on leave, will only be back at 3.30pm for the department meeting. i.e. I have to sit in for the department meeting, and hand in those documents after that.

Grrr.

So I guai guai sat in for departmental meeting, got scolded cuz both Es felt I was playful and disruptive (I was just offering tissue what...), then handed in my documents, and left only at 5.20pm.

Like what B said, I should have just clocked today as a work day and took an extra day off. Grr :(

ANW.

Met up with BREASTFRIEND. LIKE FINALLY!!! :).

Ate the famous-but-not-so-fantastic white lor mee, walked to Bugis and had NYDC for dessert, walked around Bugis street looking for random clothes, bags, shades and
eventually, I came home with a big bag of seaweed. Hurhur.

Didn't take many photos, but BREASTFRIEND requested not to have her face appearing, so she edited the pic and censored her face. Grrr..

Introducing, my BREASTFRIEND!!! :):):)

Er, ignore those spects on me. I was forced to wear them. :S.

Such great catching up session. I really enjoyed myself. Though we were walking around looking for clothes, but the catch up session was really awesome. Breastfriend 就是 breastfriend. So long nv meet, we still have got never-ending things to talk about. Hehe :)

Must meet up more hor! :D

Why hide?

Today I was sitting on the bus, pondering over some stuffs.

I suddenly realise, why I am hiding my identity in this blog? HAHA. There seem to be no point, since this is fresh new beginning for myself :).

Wells. In time to come, I'll put up more photos of myself la :).

Like now, especially after I've gotten my new spects ;)!

Matching right! :D. My tofu!! Girls, remember ur birthday present for me?? :D Hehe.

Our new spects ;)

However, anything related to work will still be kept as discreet as possible, for fear of similar things happening.

ANW.

Finally finished looking through my book review. Gonna be presenting it like next week?? I kinda just realise how near it is :S. Brrr.

Praying for wisdom, especially when I have to present this to the CEO of my company. I better not get stage fright.

Daddy, help me!! :S

I don't know what I'm feeling now.

Feeling rather upset over a pack of items left by my doorstep.
Feeling rather empty on a cold night.
Feeling rather regretful and doubtful if I did the right thing.
Feeling rather angry and disappointed at the reaction.
Feeling unsure about everything.

I long for a definite answer. God, where art thou?

The reality of life.

Its a nice, cool Sunday morning.

Felt reluctant to report for duty. I wish I was day off today so that I can have a goood loong sleep. But nah, reality can be quite cruel sometimes.

So today was pretty alright. Felt a little sorry for my batch girl cuz she was being scolded by my employer today. I think, if I were her, I would have cried too. It can be a real struggle to carry on. I had similar experiences when I just started out. When I was new and naive, thinking that everything can be simple. But the ugly world revealed to me likewise. I've learnt it the hard way, but at least, I learnt.

Thank God that I could be around when she was sad. I mean, if at such times, u can't even find a friend, its really painful..

That's besides the point.

Today, while having my break, a colleague of mine (HC) revealed to me something that, in my opinion, was pretty shocking. She told me something that another colleague of mine did (NH) and I was really horrified. I couldn't believe that she actually IS such a person. Of cuz, I told her that I'll observe myself, and was thankful that I had someone like her to warn me of such people.

The only thing that I'm quite disgusted about (sorry for being so harsh), is that NH really don't present herself like what HC said.

2nd encounter with people like that -- Nice on the outside, but before you know it, turn her back against u in front of your employer.

Such, is the reality of life.

I feel so sad. This world is so fallen. I mean, imagine as part of God's creation, I'm already feeling sad about my own counterparts (human), what about God?

Oh wells.

Then work ended. I was reflecting about my day and I felt that I don't really belong. I was reminded of what I told B ytd when I was consoling him cuz he was also feeling the same way with his colleagues.

I told him, that there're just some people whom u can click with at the very first moment. But likewise, there's always the opposite group of people, whom u can talk and talk but find that its plain shallow, and these people will forever be that group call "acquaintance".

I felt the same. I'm glad that I still have a couple of colleagues in my workplace whom I can call "friends". However today, I'm working with that bunch of people whom, I think, I will list them as "acquaintance" for now.. (Except my batch girl la.)

I feel like I'm going through mid-life crisis prematurely. Aye.

I've just finished watching my favourite drama series on Youtube :). If only drama can come true, isn't it? I'd love to be married and be so in love all the time, just like in the show...

GO SLEEP LA!

Love-hate relationship

Its been a looooong day..

Woke up early in the morning to attend PM. Like finally I woke up for PM! :S. Gosh. But it was good :). Felt more refreshed. Bought breakfast home.

Met sister to make spects at the Heeren. CHEAP! $39 :). Astigmatism has increased, myopia decreased. I'm not sure is it good or bad. Hmm.

The story comes here.

So I returned to my workplace to meet AMY for fitness challenge. Returned to my workroom to keep my bag in my locker, and saw my employer. Basically the night before I left some documents on Employer 1's table for her to check. Then today Employer 1 not on. Employer 2 is.
As I was walking down to meet AMY, I just told Employer 2 that I left the documents on Employer 1's desk. She was angry and said why didn't I pass to her. That since I left on E1's desk, E1 will check on her own. But a while back when I pass to E1 the documents (albeit incomplete then), she said that E2, being more observant, will be able to do a better job at checking.

So I just made a remark, saying that I thought E1 will eventually pass the documents to E2 to check. She just went, "No. You hand in to E1. E1 will check. If the documents are rejected, don't come and find me."

As E1 is in managerial position, she's obviously of higher rank than E2 la. So E2 went to tell her what I did and what I said. And I got a scolding from E1 over sms. She did not scold me for leaving the documents there, but scolded me for the fact that I said to E2 that E1 will let E2 check.

For one moment, I thought, what's YOUR politics gonna do with me now?

To think that just before I stepped into the ward, I was still full of praises about E1, as we were kinda comparing E1 and E2, and we were saying E1 has become a better person ever since E2 rose up to the current position. And conversely, E2 became more cunning.

THEN after returning to the ward, I got this nonsense from E1.

Talk about love-hate relationships?

Sighs.

Helpless.

You know, I feel so helpless to blog.

Ever since the previous blog saga that happened to me, I'm too scared to blog anything and everything. This blog, is just another blog to pen in very random thoughts. I have no identity or whatsoever at all. The only thing people know about me on this blog now is that I'm a CinCinnati in Singapore, and that she's a 20 yr old Singaporean girl -_-.

What kinda things can u derive from that? This blog seem to be blogged by someone with no personality, no characters, no attributes, no nothing. How do I blog now? What words can I use to portray my feelings, my thoughts without getting myself into trouble?

Totally helpless.

My original intention of blogging is to allow my friends to know about me more as a person. My blog will be a place for me to pen in my deepest and most truthful thoughts and views I have about life and the things I go through. Now with a masked identity, I have zero choice but to blog as yet another identity, something that's not very me.

When can I blog without having to worry? Sighs.

Check this out, what can u derive from this blog entry?

CinCinnati is a _________ girl..?
- Scaredy cat
- Kiasi
- Frustrated
- No stand or say of her own
- .....?

Sighs. Nothing me.

A brand new beginning

19 August 2008 marks the birth of my brand new blog, CinCinnati in Singapore.

After blogging for close to 5 years, I finally see how scary blogging can be, and how big a threat it can be if its not being done discreet enough.

Precisely I've been blogging for 5 years, I have a considerable number of people reading my previous blog, invited or not invited alike. So fair enough, I learnt my lesson.

So if you know who I am, good for you. If you don't, sorry, I'm not intending to reveal any photos, names or etc on this blog anymore. Once bitten, twice shy.

May this new blog marks the start of everything good.

God help me.